WPCA - Welcome to Hell, Enjoy Your Stay Prt 6

Vakarro found himself wandering the steets himself, much like Demon did. However, Vakarro considered himself a re-born Samuel L Jackson, even though he wasn't black. It didn't matter. He was on a mission to wipe-out the entire Fascintern army, no matter the cost. However, as he was best deciding on how to move his troops forward so they might destroy (the largely imaginary) army, he felt a tingling sensation on the back of his neck. Looking, he saw a woman with a cookie starring at him. Oh, she was devilishly cute. Why, Vakarro was certain she could probably be the most wonderful woman he had ever laid eyes upon. But, it wasn't a compliment that spewed forth from his mouth.

"The hell you looking at?" he demanded of the woman.

She starred at him, mouth agap, jaw slowly sliding down to the ground.

"I said, what. The hell. Are you looking at?"

The woman still had no reply for this. She began to make murmuring sounds, "ums" and "ahs", but never quite getting to the elegent point of eliciting a spoken response.

"Do you speak English?" Nothing. "Sprechen Sie English?" Still nothing. "Parle vou Anglishe?" More nothing. "Speaky you English?"

Then, as if jarred loose, she managed a reply: "You are such a jerk!"

"Oh, my dear Lord in Heaven! She speaks! Can I get an Amen?"

"What?"

"I said, can I get an Amen?"

"No, you creep!"

"Creep? You're the one starring at me like a stalker and suddenly I'm the creep? Where do you think you can come down at me like that?"

"Well, I, uh,..."

"I, uh, think you should get the point."

"Well, I thought that maybe,..."

"Girl, I don't think you took the time to make a coherent thought! Why, your brain is probably attached to your listless little jaw, dragging on the ground too much. I think you got brain damage!"

The girl didn't reply. She turned beat red, fury overtaking her. Then, in a fit of rage, "I'll get you, you stupid Imperial scum!"

"Scum? I don't even know who you are? How are you, going to get me?"

"Well, uh..."

"That's what I thought, uh, what was your name?"

"Blossom."

"Yeah, that's what I thought, Blossom."

But she didn't reply then. Angrily, she turned and stalked away, arms held rigidly at her sides. Then she was off around a corner and out of sight. Vakarro was certain he'd see her again, and when he did, he would definately get her number.

Graceless Infidel

Blaze the night black, see the stars shine
Firearms clack, face-down in the brine
I hear my sergeant calling, screaming for a man
The mortars are a tolling, killing the little lambs

So I'm joined up in the stack, pass along the tap
Enter the room and crack! Fallen for the trap
Caught up in a crossfire, shooting at the dust
Fallen in the mire, this battle is a bust

And now a trumpet trembles, wailing like my mother
The recruiters, they just scramble, to try and enroll my brother
The people begin to protest, say "the sacrifice's a waste!"
As our freedom's put to rest, and our country's lost it's grace

But this war is here to stay, a fight like any other
Extremists in drug addled stupor, killing my sister and mother
So I take my rifle and gear, and head for the door
To fight with my peers, against the insurgents war

They say I am an infidel, I call them little beebs
Monkey's with Kalashnikov's, I fight and begin to seeth
But the war will never end, a pity, what's the more
They've no sense of time, and wait to settle the score

So even when I'm old, unable to continue the fight
Their kids will take up arms, to kill off us infidel blight

C'ya, chaps!

Goodbye, so long, farewell, auf weidersehen, adieu and all those other little pesky miscreants intended to convey my complete departure. And depart I must. Taking my leave, jumping the fence, hitching a ride. No so much downtown but out of town. I'm gone the way of the dodo in the most lackluster of ways -- but not extinct. Been fun and all that jazz. But I must go participate in the most amusing of hijinks this side of crazy Saturday Morning Cartoon antics. I'm deploying, and heaving off like the dickens. If this leaves you with a sour taste in your mouth, it surely wasn't me that made it that way. Honest.

However, if you've got a bad case of the evil juju riding hitchback on your shoulder giving you the nasties in terms of emotive feeling (or even your intuition's gone afoul of some wave-breaker out in the ocean and it's shipwrecked), well, let me put that at ease. I will be back. I say that with utmost certainty. I'm not gonna bite it. No buying the farm. No relegation to the underdog position. No pink mist or being a Bottoms-Up-Barney finding my ass upturned in the dust. This guy is coming back whole. Of body, yes. Mind, well, that's for the courts to decide.

So, yeah, I'm off. Say your goodbyes if you have any. See you all around...in the world of tomorrow!