At some point, you'll need to be honest with yourself. It won't be nice or pretty, but it is a kindness -- even when emotions are running high and you think you're going to be crushed under all this "negative" weight. At the moment you won't recognize it as being kind, let alone useful. How could they say such a thing?
I'm talking about criticism.
Too many don't know how to take it, and when it happens, especially to our writing, a good many people -- some who've said they're open to criticism in the first place -- will explode like a several megaton nuke. And that's a good day.
When someone wants to improve their writing, often they'll turn to others, most likely friends, in the hope that they'll pick the piece apart and tell them the error of their ways. What generally ends up happening instead is that those same friends, out of a desire to not hurt you, tell you that what you're written is great, and that just hurts you more. If you aren't aware of your mistakes, you cannot improve from them. And if people continually tell you that those same mistakes are made of pure gold, well, you'll just keep shuffling along the same mediocre path.
Good friends will be honest. They'll tell you that, yes, the writing is atrocious. It sucks. Maybe not exactly that blunt, but they'll let you know. And, if they happen to know a thing or two about writing, they'll also give steps, ideas or a means toward pursuing improvement, such as: detail needs work, proofread and edit more, slim down those excessive descriptions, correction of bad word choice, etc.
Typically, most people are blind to their own mistakes. A rare individual will spot them, but that isn't the rule, it's the exception. All of us, myself included, will often gloss over a mistake and keep going as if we hadn't even made one. It blinds us to our own failings, and with regard to friends telling us we're doing great, when finally confronted with how bad our writing truly is, it makes us defensive and angry. Friends wouldn't lie, would they?
This brings me to my third point, and probably the most important: the thing that will help improve ones writing ability is self-reflection or introspection to a degree. It lets you look at your writing from a different vantage. You can see it isn't good, you know this, but it lets you try things out to find out what works and what doesn't. It won't stop blind spots from happening, but can aide in bringing out the better qualities of your writing. There will still be mistakes, those happen, but they may happen less.
In the end, self reflection and criticism, constructive or otherwise, will help you move forward. Without them, you may drown in mediocrity for years to come. But it also comes down to you as a person on whether you wish to pursue greatness or wallow. Wallowing gets you nothing. Perseverance, well, that's the stuff legends are made of.
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